Birdman cleaned up at the Academy Awards for “Best Everything That Matters” this year. Even Michael Keaton won “Best Actor in a Musical or Comedy” at the Golden Globes. That’s unfortunate, since this movie is neither a musical, nor a comedy…
Birdman is film about a washed-up actor, played by Michael Keaton (Beetlejuice), who sinks all his money into a boring play in the hopes that it will re-ignite his career. He also thinks he’s a super hero. A super bird hero. A classic setup for some extra ordinary comic situations.
Unfortunately, this bird falls out the nest before it has a chance to fly. It may have been pushed out by its more funny bird siblings, namely, this bird, this bird, and definitely this bird.
Home Box Office brings us another mini-series that fails to tickle the funny-bone. Fails to look at the funny-bone. Tries to imagine a funny-bone but thinks of boobs instead.
True Detective? Boo Detective, more like.
True Detective is an 8 part mini-series about two detectives, starring Matthew McConaughey (Tropic Thunder) and Woody Harrelson (Cheers, Kingpin). They spend their days bickering and driving, and also try to find a guy who likes antlers and killing people.
The very first Disney Animation was set on a boat. It stars Steamboat Willie, before he resorted to his stage name, Mickey Mouse. It might be the greatest thing you watch all year. It will be the trippiest, most mind-boggling form of animal-abuse-comedy you’ll ever see, unless you’re a drug addict who swings your cat above your head for fun, or you like making music by wringing a duck’s neck. Then I don’t approve of you.
Putting aside Steamboat Willie aside for a bit, let’s focus on the competitors: Captain Phillips vs All is Lost. Tom Hanks vs Robert Redford. The guy from Big vs the guy who paid Demi Moore to have sex with him. Tom Hanks is a tour de force in comedy… if we still lived in 1990. Robert Redford is a good looking guy. The comedy gene is often sacrificed for the good-looking gene…
Which film is funnier? Does Robert Redford’s one hander sink slower than Tom Hanks’ bore-fest? Is it possible to pick a winner amongst the losers? Of course! Comedy is nothing if not a competition, and today we’re going to pick a comedy champion amongst the also-rans.
A one-woman show called Gravity. Set in space; where there is no gravity, and no laugh track. Not a good start.
Sandra Bullock (The Proposal, Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous) stars as Ryan Stone, a sad woman who gets stuck in space without a hope of returning to earth. She drifts around a lot, and talks a lot more. George Clooney (Spy Kids, South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut) also stars.
I can’t help feeling that this film would’ve been so much better if director Alfonso Cuarón had spent more time casting, and less time focusing on the stars. With a 1 hour and 30 minute running time, it’s the ideal length for a Stand-Up comedy special. Which is, essentially, what Gravity is. It’s 90 minutes of one person talking. Sandra Bullock is not a stand-up comedian. For the 90 minutes of her incessant gabbing, there are approximately 3 jokes. That’s 1 joke every 30 minutes. That’s hell.
What do you get when you cross a skinny angry man , transvestites and drugs with… Aids? You get a mish-mash of disappointment that could’ve been so funny if everyone wasn’t dying of Aids.
Dallas Buyer’s Club is about a skinny guy, played by Matthew McConaughey, who loves to have sex with prostitutes. When he finds out he has Aids, he becomes a drug dealer. Dressing up in different disguises, he smuggles drugs across the border to sell to people who are also dying of Aids. He also becomes a nice guy.
I didn’t mind this film. Matthew McConaughey is a good actor with great comic timing. Jared Leto co-stars, and he makes me laugh every time his parody rock band 30 Seconds to Mars write a new song. So why is the film such a comic failure?